Some one tell Joe Boyles...

As many of you might know, Aunt Susan (my dad’s sis) was with us all last week. I think an appropriate word to describe our time with her is ‘wagga.’ (I actually have no idea what ‘wagga’ means, but my Uncle Dave uses it all the time in his emails). Back to Aunt Susan; in preparation for her impending grandmotherhood she attempted to teach the girls her self-chosen grandmother handle, “Sue-Sue.” See the problem is, the girls haven’t quite mastered the ‘s’ sound. They substitute our friend the letter ‘d’ instead. For instance, ‘sissy’ comes out ‘diddee.’ So you see where we are going with this. Yep sorry, Aunt Doo-Doo, but the laws of grandmother naming clearly state ‘the name ye are designated by the first grand-kids shalt forever ever be thine grandmother name.’ Now she could sneak out on the techinicality that our girls aren’t really her grandkids. But come on, the Wood family is a pretty tight-knit bunch and we would be crazy not to take this opportunity. The Aunt formerly known as Susan, now goes by Doo-Doo. Joe, this is my gift to you. Aunt Susan, sorry-ish.
Aunt Doo Doo did make a strong case for ‘Favorite Aunt’ while she was here. We got to swim, go to the Magic House, eat good food, wear clean clothes, etc. She really took care of us. But don’t worry all you other Aunts, the polls aren’t closed and we are taking cash donations.
In other news, the school year is nigh upon us, (that’s right I said nigh) classes start Aug. 31. Sept. 23rd is still techinically our due date for the girls. BUT, our doctor is going out of town sept. 15-18. We are gonna go in on the 14th and if Elizabeth is dilated at all they will take the girls. If not, she goes straight to bed from whence she shall not rise until the doc gets back in town. (I have no idea where this olde english is coming from, but I do try to use ‘whence’ whencever possible). So the 14th could be the day.

Roll Tide,
BR

Chuck Taylor

Yep that’s right, the girls are sporting their Converse Chuck Taylor All-Stars with their pink smocked dresses. I think that’s it, we have reached the pinnacle of cuteness, it can only go down from here. (Except maybe 4 twin girls in Chuck Taylors-that could win) Grandmothurrr Wood (or may-mommy) is in town this week and what does that mean? MORE SHOES!!! (hence the Chuck Taylors). I know what you’re thinking, “Really, Melissa Wood purchased those shoes and then even authorized the wearing of them with smocked dresses no less?” I know, its shocking. But I think Rocky Balboa nailed it when he defeated the mighty Russian Ivan Drago and addressed the Russian audience (including the Politburo), “If I can change, and if you can change, then EVERYBODY CAN CHANGE.” (By the way, that movie was released in 1985, Me-thinks Rocky was a prophet new inspired) Next thing you know, mom is gonna be buying FUBU for Little Halsey and James, and go blond. (wow, in informing you of the girls’ new kicks I referenced Rocky, the Fall of Communism, Shakespeare, and Hip-Hop Culture).
Any way, the big girls are doing great. Mary Walton is our people-person and Shelby is our responsible engineer. (I wonder if their personality differences are more obvious to us than the casual and less frequent observer, you’ll have to let us know.) We are trying to learn how to share our toys, with varying success.
Elizabeth is doing alright. She is pretty steenking worn out and has serious cabin-fever from being couch-bound for so long. We can’t wait to get these babies out. Our big concern right now is: Can we get the Bama games taped? And, will we be able to avoid hearing the score before we get to watch them?

BR

Christmas card material

Well the girls and i had a blast this past saturday as we took in the USAF's 2006 Air Fest at Scott Air Force Base. I know what you're thinking, "Britton, do 18 month old girls get excited about air shows?" to which i am compelled to reply, "i dunno, are F-18's probably the awesomest things ever?" Because we got to see a ton of them up close and performing acrobatics just feet off the tarmac. We saw everything from B-17's, P-51's and Mig 17's, to F-22's. We called Granddaddy Rhodes and told him that we were watching the Thunderbirds perform their show while we were sitting under the fuselage of a B-17. We wished he could have been there to tell us all about the acrobatics that they were doing, instead i had to make up names like, "hey girls that plane just did a whirly-doo," or "now he is rolling into a triple sow cal and then reversed into a triple lutz blitz package." Any way, Granddaddy proceeded to tell me about the time when the bombs got jammed in the bombay and he had to climb back there and kick them out and also the time when he got back from a mission with 254 bullet holes in his aircraft. Things have really changed, we don't have a single bullet hole in our Honda Odyssey.
The girls did have fun, but i think their favorite part was the people watching. Air shows appear to attract your typical NASCAR crowd (no offence to NASCAR fans). Most importantly, our day at the base gave Elizabeth 7 hours alone at home, where she caught up with friends and caught up on sleep. For those counting, Sept. 23rd is 37 weeks (a.k.a. full term for twins) She has been having contractions pretty consistently for 3.5 MONTHS now. We are just trying to keep her off her feet and hydrated. Feel free to pray for physical and emotional strength for her and also that we get our house sold; that's still hanging over our backs. But like Dad said, "At least your problem is that you HAVE a house, alot of people have the opposite problem."

later,
br

It smells like 'updog' in here...

So hurr's the deal (that's southern-hip-hop speak for 'here is') The purpose of this blog is to update you with well written, funny, heart warming, and awesome stories and pictures of the Wood Estrogen Factory (was that out loud?) I mean, my rapidly expanding family. There will be no theologizinationing on this blog. I will invent numerous words along the way (feel free to adopt my creations into your own vocabularies). Comments on Alabama Football will be kept to a minimum and mostly consist of premature calls for the firing of various coaches and the dismissal of boneheaded players. I will try to keep my posts short and sweet (and by sweet i mean totally awesome) because yall (and by 'yall' I mean 'I') watch too much TV and cant finish reading anything that would require scrolling. I will be the primary author, unfortunately for you becuase I learned my vocab, mechanics, and sentence structure from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, b-grade fantasy novels, and the likes of Kelly Clarkson. Maybe we can get Elizabeth to grace us with anecdote or two becuase she is a much better writer (she learned how to write from reading like Walker Percy and Ernest Hemingway (and watching Seventh Heaven too, but you didnt here it from me)) Also i wont use many apostrophes and the first person singular pronoun 'i' will be in upper case only haphazardly at best. Now to the matter at hand: the girls. The little girls (from now on i will refer to them as the 'big girls', which seems silly right now in light of their diminutive (yesss, big word) stature, but when the littler girls (from now on referred to as the 'little girls' (i hope you are paying attention)) are born, it will make more sense (did you follow that?)) are 19 months old and the little girls (read aformentioned multiple parenthetical statements if you think i referenced the same set of girls twice by using 'the little girls') are due in 1.5 months. Needless to say wonderous adventures are nigh upon us (yesss, cool old-englishy word used). So i hope i can update this and make it fun. I will try to use less parenthetical statements (but i kinda feel like the parenthetical statement is the blog version of the 'director's commentary', and i like that), but i can make no guarantees.

Peace Out,
Br